Cultivating A Positive Mindset in a Negative World

The older I grow, the more I come to find that the greatest stories ever told are not of those with a winning track record or those magnified by the lights and applause of man—rather—it is of those we least expect. The underdog. The marginalized. The everyday, average Joe’s who put in the time; consistently doing what is right when nobody is watching. Most of the time, their story is hardly noted, yet, over time their legacy is woven through the lives they touch. Lives that become filled with indescribable hope and gratitude. These every day heroes aren’t expecting a pay raise or a plaque to hang above their desk or a promotion. Work for them, in fact, is not work at all… it is as natural as breathing and they wouldn’t know otherwise because it is who they are. Those that live such a life are writing the greatest story whether they know it or not.

It is the tired, single mom working to raise a gentlemen. It is the custodian, first to show and last to leave the ball game. It is the elderly widow, sitting in the same seat each church service, smiling and greeting others. It is the quiet student, not quite making a 4.0 GPA but always doing their best and being kind to those needing a friend. These are just a few examples I have seen this month. We just might miss these unsung heroes if we don’t pause and look around.

I recently had a heart to heart with my 6th period class, “Sources of Strength”. It is comprised of 7th and 8th grade students. To be enrolled in this course, each student had to write an essay regarding what positive change they wish to see happen at Crosby. I was humbled to read each application. As our group assembled, I noted how diverse we are. Different beliefs. Different backgrounds. Different views of the world. And as diverse as we are, the common thread we share is wanting to make a difference.

Our most recent discussion in this class was that of positivity. We learned that the average person carrying a negative attitude about a particular situation/person can actually change the chemicals in their brain to think more positively if exercising strategies of gratitude for 21 consistent days. During these 21 days, the brain begins to increase levels of dopamine, which are the “feel good” chemicals in our brain. Theses strategies include writing down what you are thankful for or performing random acts of kindness or practicing wellness.

On the final day of our week-long study, each person went around the circle to describe a strategy we could implement. To do this, each student had to think about something not so positive in their daily life. Most shared that waking-up early was their most negative aspect of the day. As the circle continued, however, you noticed that each student let their guard down a little more. The next student admitted they have difficulty being positive when they see other students being rude. Their strategy was to encourage that particular teacher or student whom was hurt. The next student said that they view their math class negatively. Her strategy was to tell the teacher each day that she appreciates him for teaching as best he can. The next young man to share had tears forming in the corners of his eyes. Not sure what he would say next, the group grew quiet. He went on to say that his moms new work schedule makes him sad. She works late nights and is not home in time for dinner or to chat about how their day was.

As the student began to shed some tears, you could feel empathy rising like a warm blanket. One student instantly got up to get a box of tissues. Another student placed her arm on his shoulder. Most inspiring is what this young man said next. He said he was thankful she had a good paying job and that although he cannot change his current circumstances, he knows his mom is doing the best she can. That this is simply a season of life. His strategy of positive change was to write a note to his mom each night and leave it on the kitchen table, sharing how his day was and that he loves her.

One of my favorite quotes about having a proper perspective comes from a WWII survivor of the Holocaust, Viktor Frankl. In his book, Man’s Search for Meaning, he wrote: “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing; the last of human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

The vision statement of my classroom reads, “Maturing into the best person we can be, one day at a time.” Becoming our best is found in our daily, moment-by-moment decisions. We might not all be at the top of our class or win the 1st place trophy or receive that promotion we are hoping for. Though those are blessings when they happen to come our way… but it is not what defines us. Nor is it the chief aim of ones happiness. Becoming our best is found in ones attitude not circumstances.

Might the story we are writing in our school communities continue to be that of positive change and hope. Might we pause to see one another as brothers and sisters—working towards a common goal. For each story is unique. Each story is a gift. So let’s change the narrative of negativity to that of positivity. And long after we are gone, might the legacy we leave become a poem that the world will love to read.

Let’s become our best… one day at a time.